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 "Haven't I seen you before?"
 == "Nice ass."
 
 "I'm a Romantic."
 == "I'm poor."
 
 "I need you"
 == "My hand is tired."
 
 "I am different from all the other guys"
 == "I am not circumcised."
 
 "I want a commitment."
 == "I'm sick of masturbation."
 
 "You're the only girl I've ever cared about"
 == "You are the only girl who hasn't rejected me."
 
 "I really want to get to know you better."
 == "So I can tell my friends about it."
 
 "It's just orange juice, try it."
 == "3 more shots, and she'll have her legs around my head."
 
 "She's kinda cute."
 == "I want to have sex with her till I am blue."
 
 "I don't know if I like her"
 == "She won't sleep with me."
 
 "I miss you so much"
 == "I am so horny that my male-roommate is starting to look good."
 
 "Was it good for you?"
 == "I'm insecure about my manhood."
 
 "How do I compare with all your other boyfriends?"
 == "Is my penis really that small?"
 
 "I had a wonderful time last night."
 == "Who the hell are you?"
 
 "Do you love me?"
 == "I've done something stupid and you might find out."
 
 "Do you 'really' love me?"
 == "I've done something stupid and you're going to find out 
 sooner or later."
 
 "How much do you love me?"
 == "I've done something really stupid and someone's on their 
 way to tell you by now."
 
 "I have something to tell you."
 == "Get tested."
 
 "I'll give you a call."
 == "I'd rather have my nipples torn off by wild dogs than 
 see you again."
 
 "I've been thinking a lot."
 == "You're not as attractive as when I was drunk."
 
 "I think we should just be friends."
 == "You're ugly."
 
 "I've learned a lot from you."
 == "Next!!!!"

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